BOOK ONE

31.5.05

Choose a path 11

According to the med-droid I had been out for almost twenty-four hours. He was none too happy when I got myself out of bed and left. I wanted to be in my own room, my own bed, such as it was, not here. My legs were wobbly and it took me a few moments to get my bearings. The headache had gone but dizziness and disorientation had taken its place. I wanted the world to stop spinning. I could not really fathom what had happened. What had I been thinking and worse what had I done?
The quiet of my quarters was calming. I sat and stared out of the view port. Stars by the billions lit up the blackness. I began to let my thoughts drift free and concentrated on my breathing. In and out, find the rhythm of it, my father had once said. I did. I allowed my self to let go of the anger and the fear I was carrying inside of me. There was a lightness to it like a thread entwined about everything, if I chose to I could follow it. I allowed this ease and serenity to fill my being, such moments of peace are very rare for me and I think it was because I was so tired that unlike most times I did not fight against the sensation of letting go. I could see this mysterious Force, wrapped about around everything, binding it all together somehow, invisible lacing. I let my mind wander through the ship, I could see it as clearly as the stars out side the ship. I knew where I was heading and although a small part of me did not want to do this, this small fear that niggled in the back of the soul shied away but I let it go, fear was apart of being I did not break the train of thought. Slowly I found my way to His quarters, the great room with the hyperbaric chamber. I sought his presence, and found it, inside the chamber, alive without the aid of his mask in this confined space. He too, was meditating, I pushed ever so slightly closer to Him, to the thread that seemed to connect us, when I did I touched his mind with mine and felt great surprise, recognition and then anger. It was as if an iron fist had slammed down upon my head and the connection was broken, it had hurt.
I came to myself with a start, surprised because I was no longer tired or dizzy and it seemed to me as though I saw everything with new eyes. Somehow the world about me appeared brighter, more vibrant. Every living thing was somehow connected by this Force.
A few moments later I was summoned to His chamber.

The room was larger than I had imagined. The chamber which is spherical shaped was in the process of opening when I was allowed to pass through the doors. I watched, there was a moment before the mask is attached where on can see Lord Vader’s head. I wanted him to turn so that instead of the back of his head I could see his eyes but knew he would not give me that. Too intimate and I had already breached his trust once today.

He stood up and walked out of the chamber to stare out at the stars, hands clasped behind his back, thoughtful and silent. Only the sound of the chamber closing and his mechanical breathing filled the room. I waited.

“You are full of surprises, girl.” He said after what seemed forever.

“I had not meant to…” I began but the wave of his hand cut me off. I made a face and shut up.

“You are strong in the Force and your instincts lead you well enough, but you are raw and untrained and dangerous. You lack direction and you are divided, chaotic, you must choose a path." he paused. "I should have killed you the moment I sensed your abilities but I have not yet had a student of my own. You have a choice, follow my training or die.”

“That isn’t much of a choice.” I said.

He wheeled around and stared at me, I felt the anger build up the way one feels a coming storm.

“And you already know my answer.” I finished.

He nodded. “Very well. Meet me in my training area in one hour, wear something you can move in.” he turned his back to me once more and I knew I had been dismissed. I left as troubled as I had arrived and did as he bid. I had no idea what would be required of me but if learning his weirding ways kept me alive then so be it. Choose a path he had said, but it seemed to me that he was choosing my path for me and it would be a dark one.

No comments: